I was happy to practice something successful: gaining the children’s attention while Sam was helping one of the children during the goodbye lineup by asking them yes or o questions about what they would do in summer. “Who’s found to take a trip this summer!” (Raise of hands) Who’s going to dance this summer?” Who’s going to look at the great big sky? Etc. And who want to meant French? Who wants to learn Italian? This got focus for a while! I felt the individual connections I had made with these children and that was such a true good feeling. Very grateful for it. I also felt the connections I had made with the children in the dance class, same amazing feeling.

Kids were a bit more wild today, it being last day of school I believe. I am there to help with class management and was able to raise my voice and round up the children in a way that felt comfortable to me. Able to be firm and even a bit stern, mean what I say, and still keep the playfulness. Practice will help.

Pretty good, but did get a chance to speak with Nichaele and get some guidance about my concerns about class management. Feeling a bit better now, but still on it!

I supported main teacher (Sam) with class management

I felt a little better about class, but still not quite happy about it. The kids had fun and that makes me happy. Mr. Denis (from YMCA) said I looked very confident, and that's a plus. But I'd like to be more in flow and the next dance class - which happened the week after this class - I was able to incorporate more of Nichaele's suggestions, which worked beautifully. (see 5/28 class notes)

class was in ymca bungalow because of short staff. We did check in names, call and response practice, reviewed moves and our dance steps and created new moves, freeze dance. Many kids came but left, and by 9:50 everyone had left, so class ended early. We had class in the bungalow which is next to the play yard and it seems the children wanted to play outside. I believe the lure to go outside isn't as strong when we have class in the library.

I feel there's only so much focus these little 4 year olds can muster at 3 pm after a day at school. There might be some better tricks I can use to help Sam. I did end up raising my voice to get them to stay in the line Sam asked them to make. Things seemed to really get out of control. But I have doubts about whether I ever want to do that again and want to understand how to handle it differently. Raising my voice in with a serious tone felt direct and clear - that actually felt honest and good, but something doesn't feel right about it. The kiddos got in the line and looked serious. I raised my voice to get their attention (the giggling and shouting was pretty loud) the said sternly, "When Sam asks you to get in a line you do it. You do it now. Do it." or something like that. They did not seem traumatized, and they seemed to enjoy the exercise and played well after. But this is simply sticking with me. I feel they have a right to play and now, writing this, I realize I want to handle a similar situation differently, if possible. Would love that. On another note, I bonded with Fiona, who had triggered me before. I delighted in her energy. Fiona in the last couple of classes, and I wanted to drop feeling that way. This class, without "trying," I found myself absolutely delighting in Fiona's "pony kick," in her energy. She asked me to help her draw a house and coaxed a marker in my hand. I asked her to help me help her and she guided my hand to draw her own drawing. As I started walking home from school I heard a tiny voice "Goodbye, Ms. Camie!" It was Fiona, making an extra effort from inside the car to call my name. I'm not a mind reader but I'm hoping this is some kind of evidence that she feels comfortable with me. I kind of prayed for this kind of interaction, knowing how much she had triggered me and hoping she didn't pick up on my inner state. Even if she did intuit my frustration in the last 2 classes, things seem good now. I think she feels good around me. And I can appreciate her easily, support her as needed. I feel so good about this.

Supported class management for Sam, who planned a good class. *Welcome Spanish song *Review Spanish songs *Sam had a new game where kiddos perform their song for the audience *color journals *goodbye song I supported Sam with helping get the kids focussed and paying attention.

This was the happiest and most competent I've felt. I felt great after class. The guide that Nichaele advised me to create worked amazingly well. I really needed that help. That visual guide for myself (and the class) was a TOTAL game changer. I could refer to it when I needed it. Staying tuned into the class takes all my mental capacity and the visual aid helped me move smoothly from one activity to the next AND/OR choose a more appropriate activity on the guide (I didn't have to rely on my memory). I skipped HIP HOP, for example, and incorporated "attitude" intro and practice with an existing activity. I wouldn't have been able to maneuver that without the guide. I forgot my 5 min timer, but I have a feeling that would have been a game changer. Start of class was fuzzy - I learned at last minute that we were not going to the library but staying in the YMCA bungalow and this threw me a bit. Alyssa was observed, confirmed fuzzy start (which was wonderfully very grounding), and gave me suggestions and advice about starting clearly. Appreciated and needed that help. Bottom line is that I felt absolutely wonderful after the class. Many things I can improve on BUT imho this was a very good class. I felt the connection with the little ones, we had a good time, we made "moves" from their natural gestures. The book fair started before the end of class and many students wanted to go it. Pehpy stayed and it was such a wonderful experience to explore movement and dance one-on-one. She danced her own "love" dance, and she is an amazing dancer at only 5 years - a naturally talented dancer. I was delighted and captivated by her focus and vibrant movement choices. We practiced her taking a bow as I applauded. Good things to remember/incorporate (recommended) - just listing just a couple of them here for reference: Establish a goodbye handshake. In this particular class, children leave early, come in late etc. and the sense of closure was lost. I'm excited to incorporate a quick goodbye handshake so that when little ones leave there can be some kind of closure that doesn't disrupt the focus or flow of class. At least start with name in circle and can add what is your favorite ______ (color) (food) (subject in class) to personalize and help children feel special unique, cared about. This to help with clear start.

Journal / Flip Books (as momento for last day of class Review moves / create moves (snuck in call and response practice) Practice little dance steps we've done - practice in different ways Introduce and practice "Attitude" in dance/movement - try our little dance steps with different attitudes Freeze Dance Imaginary Ball Hokey Pokey Dance Charades

Again for class management class (not dance) It’s hard to keep the kids focused and ther has to be a fun trick to it: but I did feel really good about that magic moment.

I believe I may have reviewed the dance class in the class management video ask. The class management went a little better than last time. And I did get the children to be silent for 30 counts, telling them that magic dwells in the silence - (it’s actually true). We even kept the silence going after the count was done so that we could feel the magic, and we did. All of us. And it was a miracle.

I don’t have a handle on keeping their focus, at least as much as I’d like. Not all the children participate, and they sit with the ymca person if they don’t want to participate. Most do participate however (if I’m remembering well in the chaos!) I do wish I knew how to keep the focus. I believe this has to do with what games I present (do the kids like the game), how clearly I’ve explained or med up to the game (d they understand it, have they been taught how to do it? What do they need to grock to have a good time with it?), is it moving along quickly enough to keep their attention? Slow down enough to teach it, speed up a bit during the game to introduce different variations on the game or move to another game. I am so nervous about this class and feel I’m a failure. But it is fun to move and notice what the children are doing, how they are moving and dancing. I might be putting too much pressure on myself (pressure to achieve something I have no clue how to achieve or that needs time to achieve) and that pressure might be down-heartening me and interfering with my own creativity, inspiration and enjoyment of the children.

Discussion getting Michael to participate Journals while I set up music. Gather in circle to give names - maybe review rhythm more or I’m not explaining it well or giving enough time. (Will prep more sitting games to play in next class if the flow allows) Review how we treat each other in class. Michael offered reluctantly “participate” which was wonderful progress because he WAS participating! I need (would LOVE) to get better/learn further how to keep the children engaged with fun captivating games that I present clearly and quickly. I don’t like that it seems difficult for them to stay with what we are doing. That’s on me it in the children. Though I need to make room in my expectation for a lot of unfocused playing and excitement and distraction with this group, I wish I could hold their attention better. I think I tend to linger on an activity when they need a change, little or big. I believe this is something I just need to get used to and feel out by bringing intention to the class plus just more experience with this situation. I’ll review the games ahead of time to glean where I might be lagging or unclear. And put a lot of games in the plan to fall back on so I can keep things moving along before they lose attention - get bored! Review of movements while sitting in circle. “Who remembers?” Standing Warm ups and review more movements, go over dance sequence already done. Meant to add another step, but energy gets a little chaotic. Nichaele dropped off t shirt and help rally the class so that we could take a move across the dance floor together - I do wonder about my ability to rally these little ones, but This is a good thing to do next class. Freeze dance - they love this. Need to think of of different ways to do the freeze dance. Dance charades - they love this. Pass the impulse - they love this. Throw imaginary ball - they love this. Breathing in and out with arms. End with love move. And keep that kindness worh you all day.

I can do better I hope! But class went well! And the kids didn’t want to leave To add to previous question (accidentally hit the next button or was too long winded!) we learned the beginning of a dance sequence: left side toe point 2, right side toe point 2, hop front hop back for 2, hop forward for three within count of 2. We changed the hop to a sassy walk for three. Then I tried follow me as we did that dance sequence. I need to explain it better, go slower, or prep the following. I lost my own steps so that confused the kids more. Oy! I will practice. Even M had joined in and I really wish I’d done better. I know I can do this! [added note Also during the shhhhush move we changed it up here and there.] I moved into the dance charade game that the kids absolutely loved! I enjoyed it too, loved watching them communicate without saying anything. P, who was so shy with tiny voice, got “tiger” and showed me her card “I whispered “tiger, can you do a tiger?” and I roared. Then she roared with wide teeth and wild face, squinty eyes and began leaping on her hands and knees, swiping with her paws! Amazing and absolutely beautiful. A lot to express! So wonderful and all the kids copied it! Moved to pass the impulse, one of their favorites. Then throw imaginary ball. They went a little wonderfully crazy with that. We’re wonderfully creative throwing different kinds of balls. But did make eye contact with receiver which is such good connecting practice (and focusing) for a group. Wondering how we can build on that for dancing. Maybe start by throwing a ball and the two engaged there are given a follow up “success” move. Didn’t have time to do freeze dance, one of their favorites. Then in the circle for winding down, breathe with our arms (arms up breathing in, arms down breathing out). E gave us a new move “calm” - the arms slowly move down together. There wasn’t a lot time to ask what we learned. I believe I got that in there just briefly. The children exclaimed they didn’t want the class to end. So grateful for that. I really needed it! E is very savvy emotionally, and loves feelings. E will dance feeling well. Thinking about what games or exercises might encourage her while benefitting the class. L loves to dance, I think L would like a set dance to rock out to with the music, but I know L can free dance happily too. J is creative and expressive. W is wild with physicality. Very young. K - what does K love? I want to be more aware about K’s movement. L - liked the shark move. L is getting into it. I’m feeling so much better and most importantly more ABLE and confident about nurturing the children’s creativity and giving them lots of room and opportunity to engage their creativity and imagination and happy smarts. Their creativity, imagination and smarts will happen for them wherever they are, if I don’t stand in the way they will love what they do, they will love their creativity. And providing music and games and ideas for them to play with will help that flow for them. Class management; I believe I can do better and I really want it to be easy for me so I can feel more of what’s happening in class, where the students are. I feel very hopeful and excited to engage with these children again, observe and interact, learn.

The YMCA staff (Dennis) started gathering kids for class at around 8:20am. So I’m thinking this is the norm and that class will usually start at 8:40 or 8:45 rather than 8:15am. After kids are gathered we walked to the library for our class. Dennis forgot the library would be locked and rushed to get a key while we waited outside. Once inside students did journals (provided journals and provided markers and crayons) in a circle while I set up the music. Nichaele joined us to observe and help (looking forward to her notes!) We shared names in the circle. Tapped to a beat (I noticed Nichaele added some needed variety there and I will incorporate and hopefully build upon that for next time). [OF NOTE: Earlier, I had discussed Dennis if it would be alright to have children sit with him if they did not want to participate and if he could encourage them to pay attention to the class when sitting with him. He was agreeable to this. There were two students who said they didn’t want to be there, that their mothers made them come to the dance class, and I (rightly or wrongly!) asked them to ask their moms again if they had to come to class, considering they didn’t want to be there). When one young student M (who seemed to be feeling pretty cranky) asked Dennis if he could go outside. I was surprised when Dennis acquiesced and said yes. M was also surprised and delighted “Really?” Then M told me “my mother wanted me to be here.” As I remember it, he volunteered that information (and I’m wondering if wasn’t comfortable with being pretty much excused from the class). “Your mom told you to come to class?” I asked. M relied yes. “Then,” I said to both M and Dennis, “we really shouldn’t let you go outside if your mom expects you to be here. Ask your mother if she will allow you not to come to class.” “I can’t ask her! She’s not here.” “Well, you know, when you do see her.” Oy! Pretty sure there’s a better way to handle that. What’s the deal with dear softy Dennis? Maybe he wanted to avoid M as much as I did! I’m guessing I shouldn’t have even mentioned to ask them to check in with moms about not coming to class. I believe it would be better for them to spend non-school time doing what they might enjoy or be open to, playing games in the schoolyard - not every child in the schoolyard comes to the dance class. I don’t know how YMCA or Sutro supervise the children who don’t come to dance class. At one point during our dancing M and his buddy L joined the circle. I called their names to participate when they stopped participating. It seems them NOT participating was on my radar more than when they did participate. Nichaele complimented M on his move (very slight attempt to do the “love” move). “Good participation!” she said. That was amazing to witness, and I repeated, I think, agreed yes good work, or something like that. I want to praise more! Especially the ones who clearly don’t want to be there. M criticized the moves and the music, he exclaimed before class that his mother wanted him to learn street dancing not this not just “clapping” and I said I had some things close to street dancing and that he didn’t yet know what I was going to cover. ] Warm up and dancing included going over our learned “moves” (the love move, the shhhh move, the star and rocket moves). Lots of energy for the shhhh move that expounded on from J’s gesture the week before. The music helped. We learned some new moves: the “shark” (done with arms, I think of it as the “snake” but the class named it shark, in fact L - M’s buddy - was the first to name it), the “walk,” there was a disco move that E wanted us to try. And I asked the class to mirror W’s crazy jumpy crawl. We learned the

Was fairly successful in my role as supporter of class management for Dam. Can do better. Looking forward to knowing all the kiddoes names. FYI, the Montessori director stopped in from time to time. Sam mentioned that had never happened before. I’m looking forward to hearing the director’s feedback.

Supported Sam by doing a lot of “at the count of three eyes on Sam” Tapping some students to be quiet and listen. Or when catching their eyes pointing to Sam. I shushed also. Not that the kiddies listened every time especially toward the end of the hour. I was impressed that the kids knew Spanish songs and what they meant! One time they started a song spontaneously - granted it wasn’t the one Sam asked them to sing, but once done they did song Sam’s song.

[I forgot to mention one for thing that happened in class. I asked the kids what they had covered in class so far. They showed me pirouettes. And everyone did them differently. And we made a slight attempt to copy each others, but not in a focused way. Maybe next time - hope there is one! - we can really get that point about doing things in a different way.] I had a hard time reeling these kiddies in, especially the younger ones. I struggled with achieving and maintaining focus. Class started late so we had perhaps 45 minutes. Not the expected full hour, and I barely filled that time. I was a bit thrown off, and so tried different games exercises to gain focus. Lots of conversations among the kids. Things happening all at once. I wasn’t confident, for example, that teaching the little bunny hop dance was even possible. I’m kind of sure it was not possible with the skills I have. I need to learn how explain things differently than I do. I need to find a way to wait for kids’ focus, for ALL the students’ focus before going forward, without the wait ending in mayhem. There are also focusing and attention getting techniques I’ve witnessed in classrooms that I need to become good at. I felt like a failure after the class. But reviewing what actually happened, I’m seeing some opportunity in what the kids said liked (pass impulse, freeze dance), in the fact that they caught on to the gestures and were able to repeat them even when a little time had passed. This is maybe a key to helping them create little dances. I just need to manage the focus better. And I need to practice how I explain what we’re going to do next. It felt like a failure at worst. At best, there is certainly room for a lot of improvement on my part. But some good things happened. A gesture was created from a student dancer and we all practiced it. That’s communication. We practiced it in different ways and noted that we did the gesture uniquely. That unique gesture/move thing worked a little better than earlier in class. I’m really pleased with that, excited for the possibility of MAYBE creative choreography from these students. I think that’s kind of huge for this particular group of individuals. I believe we can build on a couple of toeholds (favorite freeze tag, favorite pass the impulse, ability to catch on to moves, ability to create moves and share them) in this class. And if I can guide them more expertly we will all enjoy the games more. I hope I can make good progress there, I don’t know yet what I’m capable of and I don’t want to sugar coat my potential here. I don’t want to sell myself short either. I’m generally very good with kids, and usually do very well with encouraging their creativity and confidence. I’ve already become a better person by being exposed to this one experience. I like that I want to do better, but ultimately I want what’s best for the kids. Hope I can step up! That’s how I feel. Thank you for asking!

Actually I feel I was somewhere IN BETWEEN “somewhat prepared” and “extremely prepared.” *Class started late. I arrived on site at 7:50 am. I texted contact PJ at around 8:05 to let him know I was waiting in the ymca bungalow (not at tables across from cafeteria as instructed in email) and to let me know if he needed me to be somewhere else. No response, but at around 8:20, I was told by YMCA staff to meet a person in the yard who was collecting the dance kids. I did meet Dennis who was waiting with the kids. We went to the classroom, which was locked (got the impression they need to find an empty classroom each time, the room today was the library). The kids and I were waiting outside the library while Dennis brought back someone who could open the door. During the wait, I introduced myself a bit and asked some of the kids their names. Graham playfully said he was hiding, and he snuck in between a doorways ledges. “Where’s Graham. Have you seen Graham?” Class started around 8:30 if I’m remembering correctly. *Set up music quickly while re-introducing myself and responding to kids. *I mentioned Emma (their dance teacher had an emergency but she is fine and I would be dancing with them today. *Got the kids in the circle, which took some time. We shared our names in the circle. I asked them to help me remember their names and they did. We took roll. *We did rhythm name game which wasn’t perfect, and that frustrated the older kids a bit I think (and me a bit). (I think I can explain it better! Also I sense perhaps some kids [thinking maybe Pephy and Lia] are shy to share their names. [Kyle and even wild extroverted and very young Wilson may just have felt put on the spot in the moment.] I abandoned the game thinking the young ones weren’t able to focus enough for it,. At least everyone did say they’re names, but I need to gain more skill in getting some of these kiddies, especially younger ones, focused and at least trying a failing game one more time. OR, on the other hand, working with a short attention span could be best rather than forcing focused attention - in that case I need to be more skillful with facilitating quick clear compelling games one after another, well explained. Can I improve my presentation to help their focus? * Some discussion about fairy godmother voice and magic. Some believe some don’t. Of course that’s okay. *Gesture “sending love” demonstrated and practiced. They enjoyed I think. *Classroom Norms: We talked about rules. I mentioned respect for each other, respect for teacher, respect for self. Asked them if their dance teacher Emma went over any rules. Asked them if there were any other rules or ways we dancers want to treat each other. “Don’t smash your butt.” If you aren’t hurting yourself or anyone else and if you aren’t disrupting the class, you can smash your butt. “Don’t interrupt the teacher!” discussion, and Jayli animatedly indicated “no talking!” as said a line from a story they all seemed to know. We imitated Jayli’s gesture and called it the shushing gesture. We noted that each of us do the gesture a little differently. *demonstrate and practice call and response. This went well and was practiced during the rest of the class. They got very good at it. *warm ups to music: this became even more chaotic, but was able to have all practice the “star” “rocket” moves of jumping jacks. And we practiced dancing the “love” gesture and “shushing” gesture (younger kids somewhat chaotically, older kids more focused). Demonstrated fist gesture but did not have all class attention. *Feeling a bit at a loss, I announced we were going to do free dancing, specifically freeze dance. Eyes lit up. They executed that very well. But I think I went in a bit long, buying time to understand what should come next bc not sure class plan would work at this point (and probably previous to those too!) *sitting circle discussion. What is dance? “Art!” said Jayli. “Dance isn’t drawing!” said a Michael, who is a lot older than 7 years. “Right, dancing isn’t the art of drawing, but ‘art’ can also mean stories, movies, for example as well as dance. All these are creative.” Michael said marshal arts is dance. “Can you show us a marshal arts move?” He didn’t want to. *tried adding the rhythm game (I should have known it would not work so well - and actually I believe I did know but was in denial. AND again I feel I can figure out a clearer way to explain it but do need to have/wait for attention of class. Would be great if this rhythm game could succeed. *So in lieu of “build the rhythm,” we did “pass the impulse.” Can hardly believe these kids eventually did it! We had to pay attention to each other. Focused attention. (Maybe there’s hope that I can get better at recognizing and facilitating these young ones into their groove. *Closing: what did we learn? What did you like? What did you not like? Learned call and response. Liked pass impulse and freeze dance. Was scared when I surprised them with a loud Call for their response.